[MINDSET] My Five Favorite Tips for Keeping My Mindset Positive and Productive
![[MINDSET] My Five Favorite Tips for Keeping My Mindset Positive and Productive](https://bucket.mlcdn.com/a/3258/3258268/images/b228eb5aa419e6875ff8192a5244e34242b2c6bb.jpeg)
If life were a video game, then the goal would be to figure out how to manage the circumstances you've been "spawned" into to be happy. So says the Art3mis character in Ready Player Two (I've paraphrased of course).
I agree completely which is why I have so many tools to keep my mindset positive, because the reality is, by the time you get to my age (52), life has thrown a lot of curveballs at you and if you don't figure out how to work with them, it's easy to feel beatdown and become negative.
In this blog post I share with you five of my favorite mindset tips in the hopes that it will help make every day a little bit easier for you.
Watch/listen to the podcast episode about this topic here: https://bywdreams.mailerpage.com/163
1) "Will it matter in...": I don't remember where I learned this tip, but the idea is to put things into perspective for yourself when things go awry. People frequently complain or worry about things as though there is only one type of problem: dire. But not everything is dire. By asking yourself "Will it matter in two weeks" or two months, or two years, you can properly frame how important the crisis is. Most of the time, when you ask yourself "Will it matter in two weeks" the answer is going to be "No". Maybe eventually you'll even get to the point where you don't feel frazzled because you realize that most of the challenges you currently perceive as a crisis are really just a blip in daily life. This framing is part of why I never engage in "road rage". I refuse to allow my mindset to be shifted negative because of something that will not matter in two minutes let alone two weeks!
2) "Get to!": People frequently complain about the things they "have to" do. "I have to walk my dog" or "I have to do the laundry", which makes it sound like you are upset that you have the blessing of a canine buddy and enough clothes that you actually need to wash them! Try shifting your "have-tos" to "get-tos" and see how that feels. "I get to walk my dog, because I have a furry companion who I love" and "I get to do the laundry because I have access to clean water and clothes that are nice enough that I care to launder them." In fact, what if you "get to" your entire to-do list and shift from a mindset of "have to" into one of gratitude for the many blessings you have in your life?
3) Having is Evidence of Wanting: This one I learned from Dr. Carolyn Elliott's book Existential Kink https://amzn.to/3SR8IoA. The idea is that if something keeps happening to you -- we aren't talking one-offs here, we are talking about patterns -- then on some level you must want it. For instance, are you the person in the office who always gets tasks with planning the company parties even though its not in your job description? There's probably a part of you that enjoys feels "needed" even though you're allowing people to cross boundaries that also make you uncomfortable.
When you notice this trend, ask yourself, "What am I getting out of this?" This was an amazing tool to help me recognize some unconscious beliefs I had about my personal boundaries with regards to family. Becoming aware of your own self-sabotaging beliefs can be uncomfortable, but no one said growth was easy! You'll be amazed at how quickly the problems can resolve themselves once you realize how you contribute to them.
4) The Gap and the Gain: I've read a number of Dr. Benjamin Hardy's books, but The Gap and the Gain https://amzn.to/3SR8IoA has one of the biggest impact mindset tools I've ever heard of. Let's say you decided to write a book today and you set a goal to write 20,000 words in 20 days. By the time 20 days comes around, you've written 10,000 words. How do you feel about that? If you think that you're a failure, it's because you are measuring yourself against an ideal (20,000 words) which Dr. Hardy describes as living in the "gap". The thing is, ideals are rarely achieved. They are more like the horizon line. If you consider yourself successful, it's because you measured yourself against your starting point (0 words on day 1) and you are living in the "gain". Living in the gap means that you'll NEVER. BE. SATISFIED. but living in the gain means that you see every forward step as a win. Where would you rather live?
5) Inspiring biographies: Learning about how others have managed this game called life is always inspiring for me. I recently read an 1987 book called Four Great Americans https://amzn.to/3SR8IoA that had short biographies about Washington, Lincoln, Franklin, and Webster. Although I've read a lot about the first three men, I still learned new things. Another great biography is Harriet Tubman: The Road to Freedom https://amzn.to/3SR8IoA. That woman definitely understood the power of living in the "gain". Also, when you read about the challenges other people overcome, it helps put our own struggles in perspective.
I hope you've found a new tool for your mindset toolbox in this post. Mindset management is an important part of self-care, and once you get that straight, it becomes much easier to implement the time management and productivity strategies I often talk about.
Watch/listen to the podcast episode about this topic here: https://bywdreams.mailerpage.com/163
BOOKS MENTIONED
Existential Kink https://amzn.to/3SR8IoA
The Gap and the Gain https://amzn.to/3SR8IoA
Four Great Americans https://amzn.to/3SR8IoA
Harriet Tubman: The Road to Freedom https://amzn.to/3SR8IoA
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07/16/2026 [SELF-CARE] The Brain Science Behind "Forest Bathing"
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